Author : Lee Ah-Rin (January 31, 2017)
Introducing “Thai-Buzz”, a new column that translates articles of diverse topics from Thailand’s biggest community sites and discussion forums. Topics on these forums range from restaurant reviews, IT-related questions, to even advices on love. They may or may not directly involve foreigners, but hopefully these will give you some insights on the topics being discussed among Thai internet users and on Thai culture. Feedbacks and suggestions are always welcomed on our Facebook page as well!
OP: Just asking as a case study, so I can improve myself
1. [+40] Not hung up on that thin senseless membrane (hymen)
2. [+44] The only clear difference is physical.. If girls are into that type then there’s nothing you can do. In terms of personality and perspective, it really depends on the person..can’t really generalize. A good characteristic for one person might not be good for another, so we should just flirt with people whose type is someone like us. There’s no need to change yourself to get girls.
From my personal experience, this obviously won’t represent all Thais or foreigner men, but what I personally consider a positive attribute is that I feel Farangs respect my individuality, opinions, preferences, and rights more. For example:
– Their pride don’t get hurt when I’m better at something, or find an excuse/blame others when they aren’t as good at something.
– When we disagree, they won’t try to argue just for the sake of winning or change the subject and start attacking me about other things.
– They never criticize my appearances/clothes or pressure me to change my looks. If they like something they’ll compliment, otherwise they just won’t say anything.
– When I talk about my future plans, they would ask for details and support me. They never make fun of, or discourage me from following my dreams.
– Whenever I go out with friends, they never ask fussy questions like with who? with guys? nor keep checking my phone and social media.
– They never try to get me to do something by using gender-biased phrases like “girls should..girls need to..”
Personally, I think that Farangs see men and women as equal human beings which parallels with their societal ideologies. However, it doesn’t mean that all Farangs are like that. There are sexist and conservative Farangs too. There are also Thai guys who aren’t like that too, so overall it really depends on the person.
3. [+46] ……Big
3-2: ayyyy this is it
3-3: Add insult to the injury
3-5: Hard to improve on this..
3-10: Can’t believe this is a top comment…What am I gonna do then..Have to die and reincarnate as a white/black person?
4. [+16] My first boyfriend was Thai ka. Then 4 Farangs consecutively (German, British, Swiss, British). I went to school in England since I was young, but came home every holiday so I see the difference between the two societies. The main differences are:
– Farangs encourage me to have my own social life, whether it be dinner, drinks, or even clubbing with friends. They trust that I won’t be irresponsible, but Thais tend to think that girls who drink are bad people. They think that these girls do drugs and sleep around (I don’t even smoke, mind you). For example, my family is a classic Thai family where my dad always goes out drinking with his friends while my mom watches TV at home. She never goes out to meet anyone, and has no social life of her own. She comes home right after work and watch TV while waiting for her husband.
Meanwhile, my boyfriend’s and all foreign friends’ parents all have their own social life. Their moms would even travel abroad with friends, while the husbands takes care of the kids. I do that sometime too, but he never nags me nor call to check up on me. He just tells me to have fun, and hugs me when I come home.
– Farangs raise their kids to have manners, even with little things. They would give up seats for women, help you with luggages even when you’re strangers. When we eat together, he would refill my water or call the servers for me. When I lived in England I barely had to open the doors myself. One time he was driving and it was raining, so I opened the door myself then his mom went “I raised you better than this” to him for not opening the door for me. XD When I was in Thailand holding lots of stuff struggling to open the door, the two guys in front of me didn’t help and slammed the door in my face.
– Farangs are less of a player. I know because of my guy friends. I’m “one of the boys”, and they would talk about hitting on girls. 😛 Most Farangs, both guys and girls, have lots of f**k buddies when they’re single. But once they find the right one, they’ll stop completely. But when love changes and it doesn’t feel right anymore, they won’t hesitate to end it etiehr. Even if they’re married they would get a divorce. Most Thais still think that divorce is something to be ashamed of, so they would take it in and stay together while meeting others on the side…
– Farang guys see women as life partners while Thai guys consider them as supporting role. This probably has a lot to do with old societal values that guys can do anything (party, player etc.) while women aren’t allowed to do anything. Like my family, the leader of the family is my dad while my mom does all the chores. My dad makes all money while my mom is a housewife. But for me, I don’t even know how to cook. My boyfriend cooks for me everyday while I do the dishes and laundry in return. Since we both hate ironing, we hire a maid to do it. We live like partners who help each other solve problems, not enemies in a power struggle.
– Farangs are definitely bigger, but not all of them are big. There are small Farangs too… but I have never seen a big Thai. Since I only had one Thai boyfriend, so I’m not sure about this but on average, Farangs are a lot bigger. 3/4 of my Farang boyfriends made me wonder whether or not I could take it.. The other one left is not that much bigger than Mr. Thai….
Overall, I think that many of my perspectives come from my family. Since I don’t want to have a marriage life like my parents’ I find boyfriends who are SUPER different from my dad. Both in terms of looks and personalities. But then again, I feel like most Thai families aren’t different from mine. Not saying that there’s no good Thai guys, but they’re very rare. With Farangs, if you meet them in their countries, most of them are good by standard. However, based on the ones I’ve seen in Pattaya and Khaosan, you have to understand that they’re of a different level. Most of them are “rejects”, couldn’t find a lover in their own country. Might sound harsh, but that’s just what other foreigners told me. I’m sure there are good ones too, just difficult to find. 🙂
5. [+22] Met a Farang in KFC who really impressed me ka. We were walking from different directions, but when we reached the line, he gestured for me to go first while saying “you first”. It’s the little things like these..while Thai guys will just shamelessly cut you off in lines.